The 'fearful' habit and disease of being a failure !

You can't live in the past and make a better tomorrow. Also you cannot day dream about your better tomorrow and fulfill it.

You have to stay in the present and work towards it. If you can take care of your present, your present will take care of your morrow.

You can make provisions and plan for all contingencies. In fact not worrying about the future does not absolve you from your duty of doing all that.

And also, not worrying about the past, does not absolve you from learning it's lessons, maturing and growing from its costly hard-won rich experiences.

Even if you have made the same mistake several times and you have been hurt many times, it does you no good to pity or belittle yourself.

In fact, all it teaches you to find love here and now by loving what you currently do, i.e. what you are always doing on a daily basis, what you do every moment and who you happen to be with or find yourself around, to that effect.

Always remember success is taken as a serious business. There is neither any provision nor any excuse for failure. But however, all this have to be created and built on the foundations of love. For only those will last.

Most people are working with a fearful energy. So if you are fearless, you already have an edge above and over many people.

Fearful people live in their self created shell of limitations. They don't even try. They accept their life's circumstances as given/absolutes. Worst thing is that, in some cases they can't even comprehend that these limitations are self - created and not otherwise imposed upon them. They have conditioned themselves to be so.

They always come up with an argument or a justification against themselves.

So the point is - You have to programme yourself for success lest you develop a disease/habit of being a failure.

If you aren't going to fight for what you want, nobody's going to give it to you !

- A N U J  C H U G H

The true extent of psychological damage after break up....

If you are loved, you will feel loved,

If you are respected, you will feel respected,

If you are cared for, you will feel cared for,

You don't need anyone to tell you how to feel your feelings

If anybody is trying to tell you otherwise, they are only manipulating you,

Your feelings never lie




For eg :- showing you 'no, this is the way how you should be loved, how things should be, etc' , 'I never meant it that way' (everything is always meant 'that way'), 'no you should be feeling good, whatever I am doing is for your good' (focus on the word being used - 'your' instead of our)....

Be smart enough and catch these ques early on in your relationships before they cause any further damage. The best thing to note, and observe is always your feeling. As I said, 'your feelings never lie....' Unless you are in a relationship for any selfish, ulterior motive, you will always be able to catch your feelings when they are turning turning negative about the other person ... Call it quits before it is too late ... Before you are emotionally and mentally damaged ... Believe me, that mental / emotional damage takes a long time to heal and a whole lot of positive reinforcements in the form of conscious choices / decisions later to get undo and get rid of the damage done.... I am a living example of that.... I wasted two years mentally / emotionally handicapped not being able to date and always getting into abusive positions / relations with the girls.... It got so worse that I even got addicted to the torture.... Being treated like a dog seemed like the 'new normal'... I stopped growing during those two years... The cycle and the vicious circle would never stop.... And nobody came to my rescue.... I was always out their fighting and trying to fend for myself as best as my awareness would allow.... But always falling short.... It was a ridiculous turn my life had taken.... It was the most fucked up two years I ever could live.... I used to collect all the scraps and broken pieces of my life and salvage as best as I could as best as I should.... Though my finances were good, but I was a beggar for other people's attention, for other people's support,.... It was not that.... During those two years 'I was expecting someday an angel would fly to me' (meet me by chance and make me fall in love all over again and this time giving me all the love that I deserved) .... Though some thoughts / hopes would let me to survive my day during those times .... It was actually even worse, I constantly imagined the girl would come back to me ... call me, SMS me, email me, unblock me, on fb / whatsapp and try to contact me again.... somedays I would want to kill that girl.... Somedays I would just cry in pain helplessly.... What more was that, I was cut out from the outside world, I was isolated.... Being an introverted personality in the past seem to have worked against me.... How could I have foreseen this in the past and could have made more friends ?.... All my heart, all my trust I had wrongly placed in one basket.... At the wrong time, in the wrong situations.... What more could I do ? I was being loved and reciprocated for the first time ever in my life.... After having gone through the pain of many one-sided loves / crushes before .... I 'thought' this love was eagerly awaited and eagerly deserved.... Worse than that, I thought it was the 'right' kind of love.... A healthy 'ideal' relationship.... so I put all my effort into it.... I gave it all I could.... Whatever it took, I could, whatever I should and even whatever I couldn't.... I really stretched myself for her at times.... Like a rubber band ! ..... For I never had the slightest clue that I was about to be betrayed....

Despite all the love, effort, money, energy, She left me for dead.... That was the best she could do....

Mentally and emotionally handicapped and socially unfit and isolated because of my introvertedness, it was also difficult for me to find and transition to a better girl....

I would just 'imagine' things to be 'perfect' and get into abusive positions with certain girls.... They would suck my already dry soul out.... Accelerated by the kind of ignoring they do to you on whatsapp / facebook these days.... Messages would be seen and never replied to.... Or worse, messages never seen at all....

But you know what I survived these two years and now that I am sorted, there's no looking back


Always Note : If they really cared for you, they would make you feel cared for and never give excuses. And If they are honest and truthful, they will outright reject and then pls don't try to pursue them anymore. Please don't be under the fallacy that things would change that if you keep trying or keep showing your love, they would eventually agree to date you / Fall for you.... No it's never happening, pls don't even think about it. Pls don't even wait for a moment, there are no angels on the way, coming to your rescue....
The pain of unreciprocated / one sided loves and crushes for almost 10 yrs and then I had to go through this and the resultant 2 years of mental psychological social and emotional handicap.... All due to my delusions, fallacies, beliefs and certain assumptions ....
Complete misinterpretation of 'Never give up' attitude....

But through my hard work, experience and time, I have become better, I now give up on a girl on the very first instance of a so-called 'mistake', which isn't so, but a sign of sabotage, game, betrayal, ulterior motives.... Of course, I give a careful hearing and still care enough to verify all the facts myself.... Before I make a 'yes' or 'on' decision.... If slightest benefit of doubt, she is always forgiven.... Otherwise, not....


 - A  N  U  J   C  H  U  G  H

Your life is pretty 'Fucked up' when

Your life is pretty 'Fucked up' when :-

1. If you complain too much.
No need to complain. You still have to face what you have to face.

2. If you cry for every small reason.
There's no reason too big enough to shed your most expensive tears.

3. If you are too scared to face the world.
If that's so, then you won't be even able to get off your bed.

4. If you don't understand the true meaning of life.
The meaning of life is a life of meaning. You create meaning by keeping yourself occupied in what's meaningful to you. Even if it has an iota of meaning.

5. If you keep distance from loved ones for petty reasons.
There's no reason big enough to keep distance while they are alive or you are alive ...

6. If you hold doubts on every other person or thing.
You can hold doubts but always remember that ultimately, faith is the twin brother of doubt.

7. If you think night life is the only life.
Live the night life under immense control and self-restraint.

8. If you are lost in your addictions.
You are doomed and your addictions will kill you soon. There are no such things as 'safe addictions'. Always Remember, 'everything in moderation' and even 'too much of a good thing is harmful'

9. If your idea of spending a weekoff is sleeping on a couch and watching TV
Life is much more than that. Read something. Expand your horizons. More opportunities will come your way.

10. If you don't have anything to do but work.
Work is good but not to the extent of a burnout. Rest all is fine. Being a workaholic is also fine.

11. If you think you are a loser and can't achieve anything in life.
Then you are already gone. You should as well try and commit suicide.

12. If you are too afraid to confront and accept your mistakes.
The sooner you accept and confront, sooner the miracles take place. Life is magic.

13. If you don't know how to enjoy small things.
Small things are the things you would mostly end up and spend time doing in your life.

14. If you think your life sucks.
Your life never sucks. Its all and its always temporary.

15. If you are blind-folded by superstitions.
Superstitions can even kill you !

16. If you don't respect yourself or anybody else around you.
First learn to respect yourself. Then respect others contributions.

17. If you have problems trusting others.
You should at least learn to trust others under reasonable circumstances.

18. If you easily give up.
You shouldn't give up. If its yours, its yours for the taking and keeping. So fight !

19. If you don't have any ambition.
You always need ambitions in life. In any given point of time.

Then your life is seriously and completely 'Fucked up' :) =D :P
It is not meant to be so. You can change it through conscious control. You can shape your destiny.
Your destiny is in your hands.


- A N U J  C H U G H

Our jobs are all about making complicated things simple !

Our jobs are all about making complicated things simple !

Life skills, decision making skills, problem solving skills, job skills and business skills are all about making complex things simple.

A person who can't do this even to a certain minimum extent, will basically not be needed anymore as people would rather do away with him / her.

To close this, Oliver Wendell Holmes once said, "I wouldn't give a fig for the simplicity on this side of complexity, but i would give my right arm for the simplicity on the far side of complexity."

So life and work are all about making complex things simpler....and what more, 'you even get rewarded / paid for it' 

A N U J  C H U G H :

Three Cardinal Rules for Life

Three Cardinal Rules for Life :

Rule #1 Life is a Fight

Rule #2 If you can read this, you are already a survivor in the game of life. No matter what your age, you have survived until this very moment. There's no doubt Life tried to kill you! Maybe not one but several times. Forget every negative thing, slam doors of steel and start from a clean slate. Remember your most cherished dreams, hopes and wishes. Start working towards them afresh. Start Anew. Start all that you had left behind when your heart was broken, when your hopes got shattered.

Rule #3 Never forget Rule #1

If you can do this, then nothing like it. 

You will Succeed. 

No matter what.

There's no one who can steal your dreams, but you - by not acting.

That is why it is said that you are your own worst enemy!

A N U J  C H U G H

Every Person Is Important

Every person is important.

Do not ignore anybody. Doesn't matter young, old, rich, poor, ugly, beautiful, smart, shabby.

Do not categorize people or try to ignore them on the basis of what they seem to be.

Mind you, it will turn out to be nobody's but your own loss.

I believe and I want to make everyone else believe too that if a person is there in your life, even for a moment, he / she is there for a cause / reason or to serve a purpose, though not apparent at the time.

Don't treat people, don't weigh people on what you can get from them.

Life is not about getting, getting and getting something all the time.

Sometimes giving your time, effort or maybe a little bit of money can help you get rid of the toxicity in your life.

Your kindness not only improves other person's life but at the same time, also builds your character and builds you up as a better person, as an ever shining light for humanity.

You serve others to serve yourselves and the people / humanity you serve is the lease you pay for your stay while upon earth.

So help people with their struggles, their struggles are not so different from yours....

A N U J  C H U G H

Be Here and Now ! Live !!

Be Here and Now ! Live !!

Live in the present moment if you want to enjoy life to the fullest.

No past. No future. Only here and now.

We can neither stop our ageing process, nor postpone our death.

But we can make the most of our time while we are here.

So stop waiting for things to happen, stop waiting for tomorrow, stop waiting for a person.

Make things happen instead. Meet new people instead.

Start your enterprise and be hustlin' instead.

Don't day dream / think about the future.

Instead, start right away with the steps you need to take

RIGHT NOW.

Do not try to or skip any step.

Your one small step will lead to another and ultimately to an enterprise

and an EMPIRE.

Your thoughts and dreams and ideas, will remain as such until action taken on them.

No matter how hard or how difficult it is for you, get up, dress up, go out there, and try and do something, achieve something and be back.

Once you got a small opening, continue doing it, do this everyday until it Happens ...

Until your spark becomes a big flame.

Until your dreams are achieved.

Start living, right now.

Also being here and now will lead you to live and manifest your full talent, intelligence and potential. It is the doorway to peak performance.  

Give your best you can, wherever you are, in whatever situation you may be.

There's a saying - "Give the world your best and the best in the world shall come back to you."

Lastly I would like to say, Please Stop accumulating money in your bank account, that you cannot even possibly use in your life time.

Stop being greedy. It's all a race to the grave. It all ends in your grave !

Stop worrying, start enjoying, start living !!

A N U J  C H U G H

Your uniqueness and The odds against your existence !

Did you know ?

It has been proven by physicists that so many things had to go just right in order for you to exist.

All the chain of events, right from the big-bang to our evolution after life appears on planet earth and the first meeting of your parents that finally led to your birth and your existence.

I would extend that and add the events and process of you growing up as well.

So many things could have gone wrong ! So many things ....

All the permutations and combinations were apparently in your favour :)

The odds of you existing are a million people throwing a dice with trillion sides and each landing on the same number.

Hence, Think highly of yourself. Have high sense of worth, dignity and high self-esteem.

You are a unique person. Never to happen again in the whole history of the universe.

Nothing can go wrong, what could have gone wrong have already gone.... er, right !!

You are here - a masterpiece!

Throw your whole weight down and play life full-throttle ! Right UnTill the sun goes supernova .... :) 

- A N U J  C H U G H